Letting Go: They’re Growing Up (Part 1)

Letting ‘Em Go: They’re Growing Up—Part 1

Since I’m still developing the posts I had hoped to get to this week—based on two written by Kristen Lamb at her awesome blog—I’ll allow myself to get sidetracked a bit. Hope you get something out of the next two weeks.

Really loving and relating to fellow blogger and fiction author Stacey Wilkes’ Life Lessons of a Mom posts. One of her most recent touched on her self-imposed role as overprotective mother (a.k.a. chaperone) on her 8th grade daughter’s upcoming trip to Washington, DC.

Stacey and I are both Italian mammas. My mom is off-the-boat, and her family of origin is one of the most loving crowds one could get to know. Unfortunately, anxiety—and hence the need to control their world—runs rampant. (I’m blessed enough to take after my dad’s side. Counseling in my younger days helped too—a lot.)

Not sure how much of this stuff is in-bred, lol. I consider myself a pretty laid-back parent—not to be confused with permissive. I work very hard at giving my kids their space while hovering near enough in the vicinity to be ‘hands-on’ if/when needed (or wanted).

Letting go when it comes to ‘big things’ is another story. Not saying I don’t, but that deep-seated Italian (?) anxiety, upbringing—whatever you want to call it—shows up. Every time Older Son (in particular) wants to do that next thing my mom would have NEVER allowed, I turn into a sobbing fool.

One quick example: In 7th grade, Older Son won a raffled snowboard. Of course I didn’t allow him to attend the ski club’s day trip that year! The thought of a 14-year-old on the slopes with who-knew-what-kind-of-supervision (if any) freaked me out. The next year, the moderator of the club begged me to let him go. She called, left me her cell number, etc. I finally acquiesced. (Hubby might have taken him to a local ski resort in the meantime, so we had a sense of what the kid was like up there in the fine, cold powdery stuff.)

Trip day arrived (a Saturday). Dropped the kid off at the bus in the winter-dark at 6:30 AM and waited a while. Since I was the only parent fool enough to hang out in the parking lot, I decided to go home and save Older Son the embarrassment.

Sat outside my house and sobbed like a fool. Every generation of Italian ladies that came before me channeled themselves through me that morning. Settled for texting Older Son at intervals throughout the day. Thank goodness the boy is kind enough to return his ma’s messages.

We’ll discuss the day said kid got the dreaded DL another time.

So: How do you let go? Are you naturally good at it, or is it a practiced skill? Are you an “Italian” mamma?

Have a great week, folks!

Joanna

About these ads

12 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. staceywilk
    Jun 03, 2014 @ 08:59:39

    Thanks for the shout out. I’m trying to let go, but in little steps. Noodge 1, the boy, went on the 8th grade band trip recently. The band performed and then headed over to an amusement park. I didn’t chaperone that one. First off, I don’t do rides. Second, as much as I hate it, I know he has to spread his wings. So, in my Italian way, I had a chat with my grandfather who’s passed to the other side and my guardian angel. I said, “Pop-Pop, if I can’t watch him, you do it.” That makes me feel better. Or makes me crazy. But who’s counting?

    Like

    Reply

    • Joanna Aislinn
      Jun 03, 2014 @ 21:58:25

      Not crazy, at least not IMHO. I’m always asking God to watch over those I can’t.

      I remember the first time my older guy went to Great Adventure. The only reason I let him go was I knew one of the moms was a good old-fashioned overprotective one, lol.

      You’re welcome and thank you!

      Like

      Reply

  2. Let's CUT the Crap!
    Jun 03, 2014 @ 10:24:40

    I’m not Italian by birth but I’m an Italian Mama. In fact, as a GRANDma I do the pacing and worrying about what older granddaughter (10) is allowed to do now. My excuse to, “Look at the things I did at that age,” is it was a simpler time then, the world has changed, we live on a busy street…

    I have to lie down now. I’ve given myself a splitting headache. I’m glad I’m not the mom now, but how do I stop this worrying as if I were?

    Like

    Reply

  3. Trackback: Letting Go: They’re Growing Up—Part 2 | Joanna Aislinn's Blog--Love, Life Lessons and Then Some

You've read all the way thru--what say you?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

creating balance and finding happiness

Just another WordPress.com site

Kit Dunsmore's Blog

Seeking roses in December and other magical delights

My Foray Into Food Storage

A regular gal learning about Food Storage, Home Cooking, Canning, Gardening, and more!

Don Charisma

because anything is possible with Charisma

How the Cookie Crumbles

An irreverant view of life after SIXTY-FIVE

likeachildforjesus

A college [graduate] kid's voice about Christianity.

Stacey Wilk

Where Fantasy and Adventure Collide

roughwighting

Life in a flash - a weekly blog on daily living

A writer of thrillers, suspense and mystery. On the beach.

J.L. Mbewe

Adventures that burn on in the heart.

The Life of Kylie

Charmed, I'm Sure

Scribbler's Playhouse

J.B.Whitmore, writing to The End

frankoshanko

Dancing, laughing, smiling, loving! Freedom of spirit!

RoseAnn DeFranco - Where Laughter, Passion and Love Bloom

Where Laughter, Passion and Love Bloom

kendrafowler

Social Media & Me

Peacefulwife's Blog

The joy of God's design for wives and marriage.

Marji Laine: Faith~Driven Fiction

Bringing Fiction and Faith Together

a {modern} christian woman

~ pursuing God's peace, contentment and joy in everyday living ~

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 470 other followers

%d bloggers like this: